


Re-Entry

by Eggling



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (1963)
Genre: Gen, victoria's just worried about jamie's mental state with two having disappeared basically, warning for suicide mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-24
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:01:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26083114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eggling/pseuds/Eggling
Summary: “I’ve only been gone a few days. There’s no need tae fret.”No need to fret. Ducking her head, she strained to catch a proper glimpse of his face. His cheeks were pale and drawn, his eyes red-rimmed, and she wished he did not look so dishevelled and weary. Perhaps then she would have felt less guilt in snapping out something harsh. “You’ve been gone five days and all you have to say to me isdon’t fret?”When the Doctor might not return from a risky mission, Jamie and Victoria discuss what they would do without him.
Relationships: Jamie McCrimmon & Victoria Waterfield
Kudos: 15





	Re-Entry

**Author's Note:**

> on [tumblr](https://the--highlanders.tumblr.com/post/627330968601116672/re-entry).

It was almost nightfall when she found him, sitting with his legs dangling over the edge of the cliff. All she could see of him was his back, cast into stark shadow by the flaming sunset before him. His head was bowed as if to shield his eyes from the glare, but as she approached, she saw that he was holding a knife in one hand and a lump of notched driftwood in the other. She paused when she grew close to him, shifting her weight from one foot to the other as she waited for him to react to her presence, but he kept his head low, occasionally scratching the knife half-heartedly against the wood.

After a few moments, she sat herself down beside him and swung her legs over the edge to kick her feet against the wind-battered rock face. “Hello, Jamie.”

He still did not look up to face her. “Hello, Victoria.”

“Is this where you’ve been all this time?” It was pleasant enough, she supposed, a grassy clearing ringed by plants that might have been palm trees were it not for their bright blue and red fronds. Below them, the ocean stretched out towards the horizon, an almost infinite expanse broken by a few craggy islands. If only she could believe that Jamie had simply been out sightseeing. “Everyone’s been wondering where you went.”

Jamie snorted, but the anxious, aimless scratching of his knife against the wood in his hand told her that she had hit a nerve. “I’ve only been gone a few days. There’s no need tae fret.”

 _No need to fret_. Ducking her head, she strained to catch a proper glimpse of his face. His cheeks were pale and drawn, his eyes red-rimmed, and she wished he did not look so dishevelled and weary. Perhaps then she would have felt less guilt in snapping out something harsh. “You’ve been gone five days and all you have to say to me is _don’t fret_?” How could she explain to him that she had thought the worst? That when someone had mentioned seeing him by the cliffs, she had half-expected to find him standing at the edge, one foot poised over empty air? “You’re not the only one worried about the Doctor, you know.”

The ceaseless scratching stopped, and she knew it was the mention of the Doctor’s name that had made him pause. “I’m not worried.”

“What are you, then?” She wanted to scream, to tear her hair out, to do anything if it would show him even the tiniest fraction of her frustration. “What could possibly be so important that you left me all on my own?”

He startled at that, eyes widening, opening and closing his mouth before finally lifting his head to look at her as if she was the first thing he had focused on since he had left. “What do ye want me tae say?”

“I don’t know.” Something between a laugh and a sob was rising in her throat. He was utterly infuriating, hopelessly caught in his own worries, had been more than a little selfish – but oh, she had missed him. “Sorry would be a good place to start.”

“I’m sorry.” Jamie scrubbed his hand over his face, dragging his fingers from his forehead to his chin as if cleansing himself of some unseen fog. “Och, I’m – I really am. I wasnae thinkin’.”

“No, you weren’t.”

“And you’d be right tae be angry at me.”

“Yes, I am.”

The corner of his mouth quirked into something that was almost a smile. “What are ye gonnae do now?”

Her mad dash to the cliffs had been filled with thoughts of shaking some sense into him, but faced with him now, she did not have the heart to do it. Instead she reached over and pulled him into a hug, trapping his arms beneath hers. She buried her face in his shoulder, letting herself sink into the warmth she had been craving since the Doctor had flown away and Jamie had run. He did not struggle to either pull away or hug her back, but she knew he was watching her, his eyes warm and soft at the edges.

“He’ll come back,” she said firmly as she pulled away. “He’s got to come back.”

“Victoria -”

“He’s got to,” she insisted. “I can’t be properly angry at you until we have him back.”

Jamie took her shoulders, pulling her away from him to hold her out at arm’s length. “We have tae be ready. If he doesn’t.”

“He _will_. He always comes back.”

“I want tae believe that, ye _know_ I want tae believe that -” He sighed. “But we’ve had no word for a week now. We have tae think about what we’ll do if he doesnae come back.”

It was hardly as if the thought had not occurred to her – it had echoed in her mind over and over, on sleepless nights and through empty days – but something about hearing it spoken aloud in Jamie’s voice sent a shiver down her spine. “We’d have to stay here, I suppose.” Her answer had always sounded so confident in her own mind, but now her voice seemed small, unsure. “The people here seem nice enough, I’m sure they’d look after us.”

“I found the TARDIS.”

“What?” He was staring straight ahead, out towards the horizon, and she leant forwards to try and catch his eye. When she glanced down, the ocean loomed dark and violent beneath her, and she leant back again hurriedly, pulling her legs up from the edge. “is that what you were doing out here?”

“What did ye think I was doin’?”

“I don’t know!” Victoria’s voice trembled, and she swallowed thickly, trying to hold back the anxieties of the last five days. “Oh, Jamie – I didn’t know if you were coming back at all. I thought maybe you’d left me all alone here.”

“Och – Victoria -” The look Jamie was giving her was so desolate that her heart all but broke all over again. She leant back against his side, shaking with painful sobs that she struggled to hide in his shoulder. “ _Victoria_. It’s not that bad, I promise. I’ll be fine. I’m fine.”

“How was I supposed to know that?” Victoria mumbled into his shirt. “You didn’t tell me.” 

“Aye, I know. I’m sorry.” Jamie wrapped his arm around her shoulders, rocking her from side to side as if she were a small child to be soothed to sleep. “I could try an’ take ye home,” he said at last. “I dinnae think the TARDIS would fly without the Doctor – but if he were here maybe he’d say she’d make an exception. For you.”

Somewhere in her pockets there was a handkerchief. She rummaged around for a moment before pulling it out to clutch at it, running her hands over the embroidery at the edges. The fine fabric was decorated with a strange circular pattern, no more clear to her now than it had been on the day the Doctor had given it to her. It suddenly seemed too precious a thing to dry her eyes with, and instead she pressed it close to her chest, worrying the edges between her fingers. “Where would it take me?”

“Back to your own time, maybe.”

“I don’t think I want to go there.” She rubbed her hand over her blotched cheeks, glad of the red light bleeding from the sunset. “Even if I had anywhere to go, I don’t want to be reminded of – everything.” Jamie hummed something that might have been agreement or merely sympathy. “What about you? Where would you go?”

“Dunno. Wherever the ship took me, maybe.” He flopped down onto his back, his hands stretched out to pluck at the grass behind him. “Don’t know if I’d go back to my time, either. I _could_ go home, but -” He huffed out a breath of laughter. “Maybe twentieth-century Earth, tae see some friends.”

The words she so desperately wanted to speak caught in her throat, dry and sharp enough that it almost hurt to choke them out. “Could I come with you?”

“Aye, ‘course.” Jamie spoke as if it were obvious, not even tilting his head up to look at her. Instead he reached out to catch her hand, rubbing his thumb over the back of it, the pressure of it firm enough to ground her. “’Course.”

A ship was shooting into the atmosphere, its glinting silver surface turning to gold as the flames of re-entry engulfed it. Victoria craned her neck almost instinctively to watch it, a movement finely honed after a week of looking up at every ship that passed, and she knew from Jamie’s quick motion beside her that he had been doing the same. “Do you think that’s him?”

“I hope so.” The weariness in Jamie’s words told her that he had said the same thing to himself a hundred times over. “I hope so.”


End file.
